FILM RANT:

“Frosty The Snowman.”
Plot Summary: A discarded silk top hat becomes the focus of a struggle between Professor Hinkle (a washed-up stage magician) and a group of schoolchildren after the hat magically brings a snowman to life.


This was the first movie that ever made me cry, but yet, each holiday season, I couldn't wait for it to come on. As a child, Frosty the Snowman had a strong psychological effect on me. So, I decided to rewatch the film, as an adult, and try to figure out why.

In Act One, a magician comes to school to perform at the Christmas party, but as Jimmy Durante is quick to point out, he's just about the worst magician in the world. Frustrated by his own incompetence, he throws away his magic hat. After school, it begins to snow and a group of children build a snowman. It is here that we are introduced to the beautiful Karen; the leading lady of the film. "We’re building a snowman Karen, you make the head" one of the boys says. To which Karen replies: "The head is the most difficult part, ask anyone" (Okay, nobody said it wasn't). This is Karen's way of letting us know that she is up to the most difficult challenges that life might throw her way, because she's Karen and she's got a matching coat and earmuffs, and she's just sooo... Amazing! I mean, after all, it is Karen who comes up with the name Frosty, after the other, not-so-amazing kids suggest names like "Bruce," "Harold," "Christopher Columbus," and even "Oatmeal..." "Oatmeal?" What a bunch of retards.

So it comes as no surprise that when the thrown-away hat lands on Frosty’s head and he springs to life, Karen somehow gets all the credit (even though it wasn't even her idea to build a snowman in the first place, and now that I think about it, not only is the head not the most difficult part; it's the smallest of the three snow-balls that make up a snowman, so actually, it's the easiest). Despite the fact that Frosty bears a striking resemblance to the Michelin Man, and is really nothing more than the frozen equivalent of Frankenstein, we immediately like the big lummox. How could you not love a guy that wishes himself a "Happy Birthday?" Or, is ridiculous enough to utter the sentence: “I'm Alive, what a neat thing to happen to a nice guy like me!” And to top it off, he's even ticklish. One thing's for sure, Frosty is downright adorable.

But before you can get a chance to enjoy happy times, jeopardy is introduced. "Uh-Oh…" Frosty says, as beads of sweat fall from his snowy brow: "When the temperature goes up, I start to melt, and when I melt, I get all wishy-washy." This, of course is a metaphor for death; the moment we are born, we begin our journey toward our inevitable end. Yes, Frosty is going to die, but not right away, not if the kids can get him to the North Pole.

And of course it is the amazing Karen who takes charge of the situation, bringing Frosty to the North Pole. But, once they get there, there is another problem... paradoxically, Frosty’s okay, but now Karen may freeze to death. It is here that we see their true love and sacrifice for each other. Frosty gets the woodland creatures to build a fire to keep Karen warm, but while Karen sits by the fire, Frosty must keep at a safe distance just far enough away so that the fire won’t melt him; it’s simply heartbreaking.

Meanwhile, the evil magician, Professor Hinkle, has been following them all along. Realizing that the hat possesses true magic powers, he wants it back (just to be fair, even though he's an asshole, technically, it is his hat). Hinkle arrives at the campsite and blows out Karen's fire, but Frosty quickly comes to the rescue and escapes down a hill with Karen riding on his back. By chance, at the bottom of the hill, there's a greenhouse for tropical flowers. Frosty carries Karen inside, and she warns him that he may melt. He says, that’s okay, he’s been meaning to shed a few pounds anyway (haven't we all).

Outside, the evil Hinkle shows up and locks Frosty in the greenhouse. When Santa arrives, hocus pocus (the magician's rabbit) tells Santa what’s going on. But by the time Santa arrives at the greenhouse, it's too late...









Now really, this is too much for any kid to bear emotionally, or any adult for that matter... they might as well have her kneeling over a puddle of blood. But if that’s not enough... in the puddle’s reflection, we flash back to happier times with Frosty as Jimmy Durante sings an extra slow version of the refrain: "Fross – tee…. The… snow…. Man, was a joll-lee, hah-pee, soul…. "

Okay, here come the tears again. Santa assures us that Frosty isn't really gone, and then he magically rebuilds Frosty, and everything's supposed to be fine again, happy ending and all that jazz... but, here's the thing: For some reason, I've never really bought it. And I could never figure out why. Part of the reason is that I don't think they give the viewer a long enough time to grieve before Santa brings Frosty back to life. And the other reason is (and this is just a theory) that in the shot just before Frosty gets re-animated...









...He looks like a ghost. Even though the film made me sad as a child, I thank Rankin/Bass and the brilliant writer Romeo Muller for trusting that we, the children of the 60's and 70's, could handle Frosty's death without being forever traumatized or having to take lithium. Merry Christmas.